Nanny Relationship Advice

Tips and advice for creating a happy and healthy Nanny relationship


Changing Nanny's Job Description and Figuring Out What To Do With Nanny When the Kids Transition to School

It's inevitable that your childcare needs will change as your kids grow older or work schedules change. But what can you do to still keep your nanny? According to PSP Nanny Survey Data, only 12% of nannies transition into the afterschool pick up. Here are some words of wisdom from PSP members who have changed their nanny's job description over time.

This article contains advice from two discussions on the PSP advice forum. One from 2014, and another from 2017.

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The PSP Guide To Hiring a Nanny/Babysitter: Step 4: HOW can we seal the deal?

This section talks you through making a final decision, final offer, and orienting your new nanny.



The PSP Guide To Hiring a Nanny/Babysitter: Step 5: HOW can I make this a great working relationship?

Learn about doing doing due diligence and the precautions you need to take - both before you hire and on the job.



Firing Your Nanny

This article talks through the ins and outs of what you need to know and the steps you need to take for terminating your caregiver.



What to Pay Your Nanny Overnight


This article looks at what PSP members pay their nanny when they need childcare overnight. You will find what members revealed in the most recent Nanny Survey (2015) and shared across our groups.

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FAQs about the Nanny Relationship

Frequently asked questions about the nanny relationship, answered.



Separation Anxiety with Baby: Adjusting to Nanny

Working moms talk about how their baby adjusted to nanny and overcoming baby’s separation anxiety.




Transitioning a Nanny to Part-time

 Transitioning your nanny from being full-time to part-time is a frequently talked about issue with our members. Whether the kiddo(s) are starting school, daycare, or preschool, the transition can raises a lot of questions about pay, expectations, and more as you can piece together many different arrangements. This article summarizes the advice and multiple perspectives of parents who dealt with this change: some kept their nanny full-time in a combination babysitter/ housekeeper role while others decided to do extended daycare, a nanny share or have a suite of sitters on call.  Each experience should hopefully illuminate what option you think is best for you and your family.

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Park Slope Parents and Nannies- Making the Relationship Great!

More than anything Park Slope Parents wants to help those who employ nannies to develop and maintain positive relationships with their nannies. To that end we're re-posting an abridged version of some of the information that we have on the PSP website about communication, compensation, respect, and appreciation that will help you build a strong relationship that begins and ends well.



Nanny and Paid Vacation


This question comes up freqquently on Park Slope Parents: "When we hired our nanny we told her that she would get 2 weeks paid vacation. It now turns out she may get around 5 weeks as we will be away for a lot of the summer. How have folks dealt with the situation?"



What to do About a Nanny who is Late

Love and adore your nanny, but hate that she's late? PSP members debate this dilemma.



Unanticipated "Time Off": What Works, What Doesn't, and What's Fair

Wondering what to do when there is unanticipated "time off" and you find yourself *not really* needing your nanny to come in?




Nanny Perks: Working Out While on the Job

A PSP member's nanny asked if she could go to the gym while she was working. Members discuss the pros and cons of giving a nanny this perk.



Maternity Leave for a Nanny: What to do When Your Nanny is Pregnant

Wondering what to expect your nanny is expecting? What do you do when your nanny is pregnant? How do you manage maternity leave? Or what if she wants to bring her baby to work? PSP members share how they handled their caregiver expecting their own little one.




Nanny and Foul Weather Days: What is the Right Thing To Do?

Hurricanes, blizzards, and foul weather forecasts: oh my! Bad weather can wreak havoc: transport halts, schools close, and work schedules get rearranged. What happens to your nanny? Maybe you don’t need your nanny to come in anymore, or your nanny can’t get to work because the subway stopped or their own, personal childcare needs fall through. Do you pay your nanny for the day off? Or do you not pay? Here PSP members share their experiences. Includes advice about what to do when it's a part-time nanny too.





It's Fall! Prepare your Nanny for upcoming changes!


Lots of you are sending your kids to school in the fall and your nanny is transitioning to a child attending pre-school, Pre-K, Kindergarten and beyond…

We here at PSP started jotting down some things you might want to cover with your nanny but WELCOME any other ideas.

Here are some top of mind things:

  • Give your nanny a list of all the school holidays (the DOE calendar can be found here). There are 6 full-school holidays (and some early dismissal days on top of that) before December so plan accordingly if you need or don’t need your nanny. 
  • Discuss any Thanksgiving plans, winter break plans, plans for all the school holidays, and any other time off your nanny may receive so she can plan accordingly.
  • Introduce your nanny to any teachers or caregivers. Fill out appropriate paperwork about permission to pick up, etc.


Have a sit-down meeting with your nanny about anything related to school transitions including:

  • Phase-in schedule
  • Afterschool programs/classes your kids might be taking
  • Your feelings about homework (e.g., playdates are okay, but both kids must do homework before playing)
  • When it’s okay to miss an afterschool class/activity (e.g., “I don’t want to go to karate today”)
  • Taking on extra responsibilities such as playdates with other kids (will the nanny be compensated if there is a friend over?)
  • Policies about having other people over for playdates or dropping off your kids at one of the child’s friend’s house? Do you want to know about either? Do you want them to ask permission?
  • Ask your nanny if anything has changed on THEIR side too (e.g., if they have a child applying to middle or high school).
  • Update your work agreement if appropriate.


A note about Nannies transitioning to fewer hours but the same pay:

  • If you are still employing a nanny full time but they are only taking care of kids part-time have a heart to heart about responsibilities and feelings. Some employers will feel like they can ask for extra favors since, “we are paying them full time but they are only working part time so my nanny should be thankful;” “the raise is built in since they are not working as many hours.”  This is an area we’ve seen a lot of animosity arise on both sides. Then again, your nanny may welcome feeling like they are able to help with things like prepping dinner, restocking diapers or doing a load of laundry.
  • Don’t broker your nanny’s hours.  We’ve seen this happen too—a nanny who has mornings free will work for a different families a few mornings a week but the employer handles the finances. That’s backfired too.


Related reading on PSP:

Changing Nanny's Job Description and Figuring Out What To Do With Nanny When the Kids Transition to School

Transitioning a Nanny to Part-time


Nanny Raises and More

Wondering when you should give your nanny more money?




Nanny End of Year Bonus: Do’s, Don’ts, and Druthers

Have a Nanny? Here are the ins and outs of year-end bonuses.